Tristan Coopersmith: Love Stylist
Welcome to the new happily ever after!
I’ll admit it. I like to be right. No, correction, I LOVE to be right. And in my former, less evolved life, being right was top priority in my relationships – romantic, professional, familial and otherwise. Being right felt good! It felt powerful and validating. But it also felt very lonely and shame ridden. Being…Read More
Calling all the single ladies! I have spoken to many of you in the past couple of weeks. It’s been a tough time for most of you. And believe me, I get it. I spent many a holiday on my own, wishing I had someone super duper special to exchange gifts with, to smooch under…Read More
Ok, so maybe the female cast of Jersey Shore can pull off these looks, but ladies with class, ladies looking for the men I hear everyday they want – respectable men who treat them with respect, and relationships that are healthy, happy and sustainable, need to bury these traits, deep, NOW! 1. Ms. Desperado (i.e.…Read More
I’m pretty much obsessed with the Olympics. I love everything about it – the stories of perseverance, the hope of becoming a national champion and some kids hero, the grace of some events and the intensity of others, the camaraderie, the rivalries. I even love the fashion. The other night though as I was listening…Read More
Today marks my 3rd Anniversary. Three years ago today, at this time, I was en route towards my marital destiny. We wrote our own vows. I can remember adding finishing touches to them as I drove up the coast to Malibu, top down, the ocean breeze and the sun stroking me. I couldn’t wait to…Read More
The number ONE reason to get over your ex! You don’t have to tell me twice how hard it is to get through a breakup. I’ve been through my fair share of heartache, so I know – plainly, it sucks. If you find yourself among the brokenhearted today, you are probably really overwhelmed with emotions.…Read More
We are all master storytellers. Storytellers of our own lives. I used to tell an incredibly convincing fictious story, one that I even managed to believe for about 15 years. The story could have been titled, -“Marriage is for suckers.” And in this story, I played the role of the all-knowing, all-star dater, the one…Read More
As in nature, in relationships a balance of give and take must be struck for harmony to be achieved. Sounds cliché, I know, but its true, and often, as women, our natural tendencies to mother takeover in a relationship and we can over-give, resulting in not paying attention to the scales. While relationships shouldn’t be…Read More
I can remember as even a tiny little girl (around 4 years old) my mother telling me “to marry my best friend.” What she forgot to mention (aside from the fact that yes, eventually I might actually not be totally grossed out by kissing, let alone boys), was that I first had to fall head-over-heels…Read More
In the world of dating, it is easy to get swept up by fear and in turn lose faith. But talk to any “successful” dater and she will tell you that faith was instrumental in her love quest. Unsure of where you stand on the faith/fear meter? Take this quiz to find out! 1. Imagine…Read More
Four years ago I spent some time in Africa – Mozambique to be specific. In my village there was no electricity, no plumbing, water was 1.5 mile walk away, food was scarce and to be shared among the many inhabitants. Medical care was unheard of and shelter at best included a mud floored hut with…Read More
I am really being put to the test these days. I am being challenged in every way I know on how to carry and express love for someone who is foreseeably unlovable. I’ll admit, I’m doing a pretty sucky job. Here’s what happens. Despite my ingrained belief to love all, serve all… not give love…Read More
The “L” word (love) is a funny thing. Most of us begin a dating journey in hopes to arrive at that magically warm, comforting place. But what we may not realize is that getting there too fast can be detrimental. The “L” word in my opinion is a journey in and of itself comprised of…Read More
Truth be told, I used to be anti-marriage. Not anti-marriage for everyone but certainly for me. I had witnessed a crappy marriage and a worse divorce with my parents. I was NOT going to repeat their mistakes. I would be the responsible one… thinking before I had kids, knowing that they are the true victims…Read More
One of the most recurring themes of conversations among my clients and personal girlfriends alike is how almost perfect “he” was. I hear it all from “if only he wasn’t so short” to “if only he had a better relationship with his mom.” While this post isn’t about modifying your perspective of perfect, you might…Read More
I grew up with a unique name. And at the time (the 80s), unique names were not cool. You got made fun; you were left out of having personalized signs, pencils, license plates for your bike. So I’ve definitely always had a “thing” with names. To me, a name defines you in many ways, despite…Read More
Once upon a time there was a guy – a very handsome and charming guy – who we will call B. B was one of those guys who could melt you with just a glance in your direction. He was the guy that sent you cookies and milk, just because. He’d never send flowers –…Read More
I securely locked my car and walked into the 122nd St school… my home away from home where I do some volunteer work. I’ve seen prisons prettier than this institution of learning. In fact there are several similarities between it and jail. First there are the gates. Gates everywhere! What should be a free-spirited playground…Read More
My stepdaughter has a bit of a bullying problem. Actually it is more like a mean girls problem. And it sucks. It is so painful to watch her sweet little face spill out the tragedy of the day while she eats her afternoon snack. Each day it is an extension of the previous day… a…Read More
Unreturned phone calls. Last minute plans cancellations. Excuses galore. And then finally, the elusive talk. “It’s not you, it’s me.” “Let’s be friends.” If you have ever been on the receiving end of such a series of cryptic messages, all leading up to “the end” then you are intimately familiar with how maddening it can…Read More